I've only been in love about three times: with my first boyfriend, my ex-husband, and with a man I met while I was with my husband.
I can describe each of those loves very perfectly: with my first boyfriend, it was naive and all-consuming; with my husband, it was instantly, unbelievably love at first sight; and when I fell in love with my third partner while I was still married to my husband, it was a different kind of love: fast, overwhelming, and fueled by passion.
However, if the issues were devastating to either spouse such as abuse or infidelity, the chances of reconciliation are much smaller.
It would take a great deal of counseling and work in the relationship to prove the adulterer or abuser is trustworthy and safe.
" My husband and I were together for 20 years before we divorced.
It's easy to skip ahead to "I love you" after four or five drinks, though harder to backtrack to "But do I like you?
The reasons why you decided to get a divorce has an impact on the chances of reconciliation.
If a divorced couple lacked effective communication skills or lost the passion they once had, which caused the break up - reestablishment of the relationship could happen with some major work on the issues that were present during marriage.
If the problems in your marriage are reversible, in that with work you can solve them, it's possible you can reconcile.Generally, though, I couldn't swap my husband's face with Mr.Darcy's as easily as I used to exchange the heads of my Barbie and Ken dolls as they rolled around on the Dream House bed.My previous blog ("Should You Date Your Ex-Spouse," dated 1/17/11) made the audacious proposal for considering dating an ex-spouse, since the likelihood of strong positive feelings when getting married could create a positive basis for a renewed relationship, if both parties have matured and stopped blaming each other.Dating an ex-spouse should not be simply a response to loneliness, matter of convenience and/or lack of alternatives.
The children are one of the biggest reasons why some people don't get divorced and is also a factor in getting back together.